In her first major interview since filing for divorce from Ben Affleck, Jennifer Lopez has opened up about the emotional rollercoaster she experienced during the split and the profound impact it had on her life. Speaking with Nikki Glaser for Interview Magazine, Lopez, 55, candidly discussed the challenges of navigating her personal life, her evolving self-worth, and the lessons she has learned from her tumultuous journey.
"I think my whole life I've just been trying to say I'm good enough, until where I am now, when I know. I'm giving myself credit," Lopez said. Reflecting on her journey from her roots in the Bronx to her status as an international superstar, she added, "I'm telling that little girl that grew up in the Bronx, 'You've done really good for yourself.' I didn't do that for so many years."
Lopez's candid remarks come after a whirlwind few months that saw her file for divorce from Affleck on August 20, citing irreconcilable differences. The couple, who tied the knot in a lavish ceremony in Georgia in 2022 after a secret Las Vegas wedding, had sparked split rumors earlier this year. Despite the public speculation, Lopez said the separation process has been about finding peace with herself. "There's something to be said for that because things can really change your life in a way that you do want to give up and say, 'F- this, this is too hard,'" she said. "But I'm not there. I refuse to not give myself everything that little girl deserves."
Lopez acknowledged the difficulty of the situation, describing this period as "probably the hardest time in my life." She noted how her expectations for the relationship didn't align with the reality she faced, saying, "I was thinking about this time in my life, and I'm like, 'That's not what I thought it was going to turn out like.' And then I thought, 'No, this is exactly where I needed to be, to lead me to where I want to go.'"
In the interview, Lopez spoke about her commitment to introspection and the importance of learning from her experiences. "When you get to a point where you think that you've learned the lessons, and then it blows up in your face again, you realize, 'OK, I haven't, so what is it that I need to look at right now?'" she said. She emphasized that self-reflection is crucial to her growth, adding, "Never stop looking inward, because it's so easy to blame everybody else."
Despite the upheaval, Lopez is embracing her newfound independence with optimism. She shared her excitement about the idea of being on her own, stating, "I'm not looking for anybody, because everything that I've done over the past 25, 30 years, being in these different challenging situations, what can I f-ing do when it's just me flying on my own? What if I'm just free?" For Lopez, the journey toward self-reliance is both empowering and daunting. "It feels sad. It feels desperate," she admitted. "But when you sit in those feelings and go, 'These things are not going to kill me,' it's like actually, I am capable of joy and happiness all by myself."
Lopez's decision to step back from her relationship with Affleck is not the first time she has had to reevaluate her partnerships. Her friendship with stylist Jessica Mulroney also faced strain after Mulroney's involvement in a race-related controversy in 2020. At the time, Lopez distanced herself from Mulroney, recognizing that her personal associations could affect her public image. "Meghan said friends reflect friends, and because of what's at stake, she can no longer be associated with Jessica, at least not in public," a source had said during the fallout.
The complexities of her relationship with Affleck extend beyond their romantic ties, as the couple has been spotted maintaining a cordial relationship for the sake of their blended families. The exes were seen grabbing lunch with their children in Los Angeles recently, sparking rumors of reconciliation. However, insiders confirmed that while they have lingering doubts and shared moments of reflection, the divorce proceedings are still moving forward. "They both know they will be in each other's lives because of the kids and are remaining friendly. But the divorce is still happening," a source revealed.
Lopez's journey through this challenging period has been marked by a deeper understanding of her own needs and desires. She noted that the experience has been a powerful reminder of the importance of self-worth, stating, "I thought I learned that, but I didn't. And then, this summer, I had to be like, 'I need to go off and be on my own. I want to prove to myself that I can do that.'"
Lopez ended the interview by reflecting on her ongoing quest for personal growth. "I used to say I'm a happy person but was still looking for something for somebody else to fill, and it's just like, 'No, I'm actually good,'" she said. This new chapter in her life, Lopez indicated, is about finding joy within herself and not relying on others to complete her sense of happiness.
